Ten “Proofs” There Is No God, And If There Is, He Isn’t Female

In no particular order:
1. People poop.
2. Men’s mouths aren’t located immediately north of their penises.
3. Women are not superior. If we were, we’d stop doing everything and start delegating.
4. Speedos.
5. Children don’t stay small and cute and sleep most of the day.
6. Gravity.
7. By the time you really don’t need the money, you start earning it.
8. There was only one Ruben.
9. Just when you get really good at the emotional and spiritual part of love-making, the physical part quits on you.
10. Crack. In any and every form.

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